The

Muslim Housewife

Ramadan has surprised us once again with its quick and sudden arrival.  The day’s fast is a bit more grueling than before, peaking around 14 hours.  When one’s mouth becomes parched from thirst and one’s stomach twists and turns from hunger it makes you grateful for all that Allah has given you.  We quickly take for granted having food and water readily available to us.  We walk up to the sink and fill our glass with water to quench our thirst at anytime we want.  We have the ability to pick and choose what we want to eat and what we feel like eating.  Unfortunately there are many in the world who haven’t had a bite to eat for countless days, or haven’t had clean water to drink to quench their thirst.  Picking and choosing what to eat and drink is far from their concerns.

There are many things you can do this month and year around to show your gratefulness and help those less fortunate.

1. Before eating and drinking make sure you pause and take a second to be grateful for the food and drink that awaits you.  Make sure you recite the specific duas before and after eating.

2. Make a consistent donation (every month) towards feeding the hungry.

Places to donate:

Africa Food Crisis

Access to Water Project

3. Want a more creative way to help the hunger crisis? Check out the following…

 FreeRice-Really cool website!  Learn and help end world hunger at the same time by providing rice to hungry people for free

The Hunger Site-Click the icon to give free food.  When you click, sponsors pay to distribute food to those in need.

4. Volunteer at a soup kitchen.  This makes one aware that this is not just a global issue but a local one as well.  It’s also a great opportunity to do dawah.

 Click here to find a soup kitchen in your area.

5. Remember the most powerful thing you can do is remember the people in need in your duas, Allah is Most Powerful and inshallah will make things  easy for them.

A few months ago I received a video titled “Chicken a la Carte.” It won an award for being best short film (6 minutes) and tells a true story.  Its what brought tears to my eyes when I saw the children laughing and it is what motivated me to write this post.  Watch below.

View this movie at cultureunplugged.com

We’ve all had a child fall and get hurt, sometimes it ends up being a big boo boo and sometimes a small one.  Whatever the case, Moms and Dads usually do anything to soothe the child and make them stop crying.  We may try different distraction techniques like give them a candy or show them their toys, or maybe even tell them we’ll take them outside.

In reality there is no better way of soothing a child than with the words of Allah.  Since coming to Egypt (Subhanallah its almost been 6 months, quite unbelievable!) Ahmed and I started something new with our daughter Isra.  We started reciting Surah Al-Fatiha upon the spot she would  get hurt.  Subhanallah the moment we would start reciting the surah she would immediately calm down.  This is anywhere from a small fall on the ground to really big boo boos.  About a month ago we went to Chilli’s for dinner.  There was a play area in the back where they had a moonwalk and a swing set.  Of course Isra wanted to sit on the swing so Ahmed took her to play for a little bit.  The swings were not really toddler proof so Ahmed had to stay with her and literally hold her on the swing, it was still quite enjoyable to her lol.  Anyways, Ahmed turned around for a split second and she ended up flipping onto the floor.  Her lip busted and her nose started bleeding profusely!  As you can imagine she was screaming on the top of her lungs not only from the pain but from the sight of the blood as well (my poor lil baby!)  As we tried to stop the bleeding I  put my finger on where she got hurt and started reciting Surah Al-Fatiha.  And within minutes Isra immediately calmed down and stopped crying-Subhanallah!

I think this is a great habit we can implement with ourselves and our families, after all Allah is the one who heals.  It’s really amazing how easily one can make things into habits with children.  As I said I started this about 6 months ago, about a month before Isra turned one, now whenever she gets hurt she waits for me to recite Surah Al-Fatiha or she say “Momma, Momma Allah o Akbar” meaning Momma recite!  Sometimes I’ve even caught her reciting upon herself when she gets hurt (she can’t recite the surah yet but her equivalent is to say “Allah o Akbar”)  and lastly when she sees Ahmed or I get hurt she quickly runs to us, puts her hand on our boo boo, says Allah o Akbar, blows on it, and gives it a kiss…May Allah protect her!

         Surah Al-Fatiha

As many of  you know I have officially moved to Michigan.  Alhumdulilah it’s nice being home.  In the beginning there were times when I went out to run errands kind of forgetting I was in Michigan, and when I would run into people I knew it was a pleasant surprise.  I have been staying with my in laws and make trips to visit my family every few weeks, I forgot what a great blessing it was to be able to go see my parents whenever I want, Alhumdulilah.

Living with my in laws has been a nice experience Alhumdulilah.  When you live with someone you build a relationship with them that cannot be built over the phone.  It’s a nice time to understand your in laws and get to know their likes and dislikes.  I feel you build a true relationship with your in laws when you live with them for a period of time.  In this day and age many daughter in laws become hesitant to stay with there in laws even if it is for a temporary time.

Now a days there are some women who put a wall up between their in laws and themselves.  This is the start of a bad beginning.  One must understand that although differences may occur your in laws are your husband’s family and they deserve to be respected.  Often you hear of the stereotypical mother in law who is overruling and always involved in your relationship with your husband.  I am not denying that there are some mother in laws who fit in this category, and these type of mother in laws need to realize that these sort of relationships are not about a power trip, instead they should be relationships of comfort and love.

People also need to realize there will be times of disagreement and misunderstanding, but then again things like this happen when you are human and it doesn’t mean its the end of a relationship or end of the world for that matter.  As Muslims we need to deal with situations with the best manner.  And even if your mother in law is wrong and you’re right it doesn’t mean you need to go the extra mile in a disagreement to prove your point.  The following hadith opened my eyes:

Abu Umamah narrated: Allah’s Messenger Messenger (pbuh) said. “I guarantee an abode within the boundary of Paradise for one who gives up arguing, even if he is right; and I guarantee a home in the middle of Paradise for one who abandons lying even for the sake of fun, and I guarantee the sublime portion of Paradise for one whose conduct is good.” (Abu Dawood)

I think this is a good enough reason to hold your tongue in matters of disagreement!

I have been seeing and hearing a lot of divorce occuring in our Ummah.  And in a few personal cases that I know of, most of the time the couples have a good relationship, but it was the interfering of in laws that drove the once happy couple apart.  Are petty differences worth a divorce?  The Quran states a beautiful ayah,

“And not equal are the good deed and the bad.  Repel evil by that deed which is better; and thereupon, the one whom between you and him is enmity will become as though he was a devoted friend (41:34).

What a wonderful advice from Allah SWT Himself!  Subhanallah!  I believe many relationships can be saved if this beautiful advice is followed.

I leave you with a piece of advice my dear father gave me when I got married 6 years ago.  “Beta (my dear daughter), remember if you want a blissful marriage make your husband’s family as if it is your own.”  Alhumdulilah I followed his advice, and by the grace of All Mighty Allah, Allah has blessed me with a good marriage.

May Allah protect my husband’s family, May He give them all the good in this life and even better in the hereafter!