My husband and I finally got a chance to go on a date while my in laws were here during the holiday season.  To make in easy on my mother in law we decided to wake up super early one morning to have breakfast at Panera. It’s funny how parents make plans to do something solo and somehow kids just know you’re up to something.  My kids rarely wake up before 8 am but of course the morning we had plans to sneak out was the morning my 2 year old decided he wanted to cling onto his mother at 5:30 am and it was the morning my 4 year old daughter was wide awake at 6:00 am!  Nevertheless I lulled my son back to sleep and wiggled out of the headlock he had me in and I told my daughter that it was still dark outside which meant it was still sleepy time.  Soon after I quickly got myself and our newborn son ready to go and told my husband to meet me in the car. It was 7:00 am.

I was thrilled to have a few hours alone (an accompanying newborn doesn’t count) with my husband, it had been months since the last time we were able to do this and I was indeed looking forward to the few hours of quiet time, a time Ahmed and I could just talk about stuff and about each other.  We got to Panera and were trying to decide what breakfast items to get.  As I was trying to decide I couldn’t help but to think about the kids-Musa would love the M&M cookie, oh and look a cute gingerbread man cookie, Isra would love that. Already my mind was back thinking about the kids, I finally snapped out of it grabbed our food and headed to a table.

Now it was just the two of us quietly eating our food, no kids asking for a bite or spilling juice across the table.  You’d think we’d have dreamy things to say to one another, an exchange of smiles or loving glances.  Instead we resorted to a conversation about our favorite and most beloved topic…our children!

Ahmed and I talk about the kids often, very often, but this time it was the most heartfelt, emotional conversations we’ve had about the kids. We talked about each kid’s strengths and weaknesses and our aspirations for them. We laughed when we discussed how our lefty kids have a hard time remembering to eat with their right hand and we cried when we realized that before we’ll know it we will be gone from their lives only hoping we raised them well, only hoping we left an awesome legacy behind.  It was the first time both Ahmed and I had tears rolling down our cheeks at the same time and although I know we both love our children dearly it was the first time I felt the love we had for our kids radiating between our hearts…a connection.

Its strange how parenthood totally changes you.  The minute you have your first baby your whole life changes.  That child becomes your number one priority, always on your mind. Multiply that by three and your mind is tripled worried, triple concerned and triple happy.