Wife of a Consultant.
Yes that’s me, I am a wife of a business intelligence consultant. What is a consultant you ask? A consultant works in partnership with clients, advising them how to use information technology in order to meet their business objectives or overcome problems. Consultants work to improve the structure and efficiency and of an organsiation’s IT systems.
I have been married for over 5 years now Alhumdulilah, out of the 5 years my husband has been a consultant for a little over 2 years. So what’s the big deal? You might be thinking it sounds like a regular 9am-5pm job, and I have the house clean and dinner ready by the time he comes home in the evening, think again. As a consultant my husband flies out on Sunday nights and comes back home on Thursday nights.
This may be a hard relationship for most people. It’s not for everybody. You have to be prepared to be away from your husband 4 days out of the week, take care of everything at home on your own, and be ready to share him with other events and things on the weekends. In the beginning it took a little time to get use to, I would miss him dearly as I laid down in bed and would count the days till Thursday night would arrive. But after sometime it just became a way of life.
Being the eldest amongst my siblings I had always been quite independent, I think this quality really helps me with this lifestyle. You have to know how to keep yourself busy (Isra does a great job in this department!) and most importantly keep up with yourself even though your husband is not around. I remember in the beginning I use to be in my PJs most of the day since it was just me and Isra, but I soon realized this really affected the way I felt. So I started getting ready and took care of myself, I felt a big difference. Isra apparently saw a difference too because when I walked out of the bedroom she said “Oh wow”!
There are definitely pros and cons of being a wife of a consultant.
Some pros include…
-Traveling to different places with my husband a few weeks here and there. So far we have been blessed to have seen California, North Carolina, and South Carolina. Whenever he has a new project Isra and I try to go visit him for a few weeks to check out the area!
-You start to appreciate one another a lot more since you see a lot less of each other.
-Being alone at home taking care of a child and household chores makes you stronger as a woman.
Some cons include…
-You’re not together as a family as often as you would like
-The weekends together go by way to fast
-Cooking for one person is hard, you just don’t feel like cooking when you have to just feed yourself!
-Not seeing your husband on a daily basis.
All in all, the profession of a consultant can easily break a marriage if one chooses career over their relationship. It cannot work with all people, it is very important to discuss this career option with your spouse or soon to be spouse before getting married because it can be a big test for a relationship. Alhumdulilah my husband and I agreed that we were both the type of people that could handle this lifestyle!
And guess what day tomorrow is? THURSDAY! The day my husband comes home inshallah 
South Carolina to Illinois
Humza Arshad on 23 Jul 2008 at 11:49 pm #
Yeah, I don’t know many people that could get used to that lifestyle. AlHamduLillah it’s been working out for all 2 and 1/2 of you… “Oh wow!”
Cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute
Mariam Arshad on 24 Jul 2008 at 9:17 am #
“Oh, WOW”
i miss my googers incredibly!
Ahmed on 24 Jul 2008 at 4:28 pm #
Mashallah, a very balanced post, as always…. thank you for being strong. (Typing this from the airport)
Ayesha on 24 Jul 2008 at 4:55 pm #
I know what you mean about cooking for just one person. When I lived in Ann Arbor sometimes I’d just go to bed hungry because I had no motivation to cook for myself. It’s boring when there isn’t someone to tell you, “Wow, that smells good!”
Oh, and if you’re free so much, we should hang out sometime insha’Allah. Def before you’re no longer my neighbor.
Liv on 24 Jul 2008 at 11:17 pm #
man, siraaj is gonna be gonna for about 20 days straight next month…im kinda looking forward to it actually. i may temporarily take on a Tom Sawyer-Huck Finn identity in a search for adventure =)
i remember it was so hard when he was gone when i was pregnant with salahudeen and amatullah was little less than 2. but i just feel like this time will be different. we’ll see! here’s to Ilm Summit!
cristina vidican on 25 Jul 2008 at 4:55 pm #
farah! i like reading these posts, makes me feel connected
hope we can see eachother again sometime! let me know if you’re ever traveling to virginia, it’d be nice to see you and isra.
Bibi on 29 Jul 2008 at 1:48 pm #
Alhamdulillah..Allah has bless you with a good relationship. I know what you are talking about because my hubby does travel alot too right now he is gone for 2 weeks. My children keep me busy but I agreed at night when I am all done with the kids, I do miss him. Same here, you have to have a good relationship to be living this type of live. I am bless. Same here take care of the kids extra activities, house, chores, groceries etc. Thanks for sharing at least I know there are Sisters out there with the same situation as mine.
Liv on 30 Jul 2008 at 11:14 pm #
hey man, when’s th enext post comin’ up? its long overdue! =)
Seher on 09 Aug 2008 at 8:11 am #
Salamz hun,
You have the same life as fauz! Yes you are right its not for everyone. I’m glad you have adjusted to it.
I totally know how you mean about getting ready right away. I used to stay in my jammis till 2 or even 3. but as soon as i started getting right away, i felt more productive. I was out and about running errands, meeting up with friends, etc.
admin on 14 Aug 2008 at 12:41 am #
Hey Salaams Seher!
How are you? I thought I lost you as my blog reader since I havent heard from you in some time. Glad to know you’re still reading
Hope all is well with you and your family. Inshallah maybe Ill bump into you at Irfan’s walimah this weekend!